Q: Why is there so much mention of “Safe, Sane and Consensual”?
A: The origination of the terminologies used in our lifestyle invokes many ‘negative’ stereotypes.
The difference between what we are, and, what people may believe we are is in the degree of consensuality that many of us bring to our lives. Many love and cherish their partners. Many hold a deep and abiding respect for life and the potential that other people bring to it.
Generally speaking, nothing we do will cause permanent physical harm or debilitating emotional trauma. People involved in the physicality of S&M activities often speak of it as though it were a rigorous sport. At times it may be somewhat painful or potentially dangerous, but it is exhilarating none-the-less.
Safety is our most important point. We realize that once you have decided that you wish to embark on this journey into the erotic, you will be extremely driven to find a partner to enjoy playing with. The community continually emphasizes safety.
Q: What goes on at the meetings?
A: Our group is moderated by a panel of experienced lifestyle “Coordinators,” who organize and lead the meetings.
Each week our group has a topic of discussion that is presented by one of our willing (sometimes) volunteers. After their presentation, the floor is open to all persons attending to ask questions, offer suggestions and take part in what is quite often a spirited and fast moving give and take of ideas. Meetings are also a wonderful way of getting to know others like you and to possibly meet a person of interest. We have a variety of singles, couples and all orientations at our meetings. Everyone is welcome . . . 19 and over, please. We are not a swingers club or sex club. We do not “play” at the meetings.
Q: Is there a dress code for meetings?
A: Yes . . . you will have to wear a yellow chicken suit and frogman flippers.
JUST KIDDING . . . Please feel free to wear what ever you wish, jeans, casual clothes, a suit, or fetish wear if you desire. This is one place that you can feel totally comfortable wearing your fetish gear. The only thing we ask is that you keep your fetish wear covered up while in the parking lot or lobby of the hotel. You may remove your cover up when in our meeting room. We like our hotel home and do not wish to offend hotel guests or staff.
Q: OK, I’m interested . . . where is the meeting?
A: Please go to our meetings page for info.
Q: How do I become a member?
A: Come to our meeting, get to know us, if you wish to join we will request that you fill out a membership form and pay a $25.00 yearly membership. Benefits of membership include discounts at many adult and fetish wear shops in New York and Long Island, discounted admission to play parties held at various venues and more. You will be required to prove, with photo ID, that you are over 19 years old.
Q: I’m still a bit unsure of myself, what do I do?
A: We maintain a FetLife group that lets you keep in contact with us, post messages, questions, communicate, and feel your way around the lifestyle, as well as share ideas and ask questions. Click on the links and join us!
Q: How do I know what the topic of a meeting will be?
A: We have two or three meetings a year to map out prospective topics for discussion. Ideas from the floor and volunteers for presentations are always sought after and welcome. Share with us. It’s fun!
Q: Do you ever get together for play parties?
A: Yes, we often attend public play clubs as a group and with other similar groups in the Tri-State area. Many of us also attend private parties given here on Long Island with others in our lifestyle. Getting to know us is one of the best ways to find out what is happening in the area.